Monday, August 10, 2009

Adventure Day 19 – More Social Time

I had great plans for my Day 18. I was excited to go to a Vegan Restaurant with a friend from school, she’s decided to try going vegan for a month and really wanted to try this restaurant, unfortunately our efforts have yet to pan out – we didn’t make it this day either.

I had a sort of short notice breakfast meeting for work at a restaurant in town (that I’d never been too – yay!) so since we would get paid for going AND a free yummy breakfast I had to go – therefore thwarting hope for a vegan meal. Hopefully next week!

I went to the breakfast meeting mostly for my own gain, not actually really knowing what it was all about. I soon found out it was a meeting to discuss the ‘goings on’ of our work place and another house in the city (run by the organization I work for). Yikes! It was with our ‘higher up’ bosses and was a time for people to inform them of how we felt about our jobs and all that kind of stuff. There were a few highly emotional moments and all that fun stuff, I got enlightened to a few things, but that was pretty much the gist of it. My main concern was my beautiful Monte Christo sandwich on my plate – it was very good! AND I’ve never had one before. I really am loving trying all sorts of new things!

Ok so after I got home I had a 2 hour catch up nap (as my social times that week were really taking their toll on me – poor baby). Then I think I blogged a bit and lazed about until it was time for my ‘girls night’. Now this isn’t the actual #12 on my list, it was actually an impromptu ‘Are you guys free Friday’ kind of get together with a few girls I went to high school with.

The cool thing about this small group is that it is made up of 4 of us girls who all went to the same high school together, yet were never really friends with each other during those years. A couple of years ago when facebook became popular each of us reconnected with one specific friend and she invited us over to reconnect. I’m not sure about the other girls but I got all excited to get together with this friend but initially did not realize that she had invited 3 of us over to hang out and ‘reconnect’ together. Honestly at first I was a bit annoyed because I just wanted to see her. I knew the other two ladies but didn’t KNOW the other two ladies. Don’t get me wrong I wasn’t infuriated or anything, just surprised. And it wasn’t’ because I didn’t’ like them, I just didn’t really KNOW them. And let’s face it, you remember people a certain way and wonder if they are the same or different, or just what you could possibly have in common now.

Well since that first gathering we’ve made a point to meet, on average, 3 times a year or so. We obviously found something in common. At first we spent most of our time talking about old school friends: who we knew of still, who we didn’t, who’d gotten fat and who was as screwed up as ever - that’s what old friends do, but we weren’t even old friends. After a couple more gatherings we soon started to interconnect with one another, our ‘base person’ was no longer our ‘base person’. At this point we’ve all visited each other’s homes, done favours for each other: babysitting, dog sitting, home party visiting, photography, all sorts of stuff. Now I certainly wouldn’t describe us as ‘the sisterhood of the travelling pants’ or anything but we are a group of ladies (that makes us sound old) that hang out every few months for no good reason really but to do it.

I know a lot of people that wouldn’t make the effort or time to do this, they have kids to worry about, jobs that exhaust them, and would rather know that the people they are investing their time in are fun, understanding, and relatable. In the beginning that’s how I was (sorry ladies – I’m telling the truth). I thought ‘Oh Artsy’ (the friend that got us together at first) ‘I just want to visit with you, I don’t have any interest in wasting my time with old people from school I don’t even really know – what could we possibly have in common?’ After thinking that I went to our first girls night to get it ‘over with’ and soon found myself looking forward to our next evening together.

Let me reveal who makes up our little group. There is Artsy, our founder, who has been married nearly as long as I have and has three beautiful children (2 boys and 1 girl). She’s a stay at home mom with many creative talents (cake decorating, photography, art of all kinds, hospitality). She always seems to find herself in the middle of an interesting story (at least that’s what I’ve noticed). Then there is Luvvy, who is a year older than the rest of us, she is an animal lover to the greatest degree, and spends her time doing anything to help little furry friends. She recently got married and had a sincerely wonderful simple wedding – the only kind I think should be allowed. She’s so thoughtful, kind and caring that I am sometimes ashamed of my honest and flawed self (but if she heard me say that I’d be chastised). Then there is Shell Bell, who I did know the most as a young child (and probably the longest of anyone else in the group). She is a mommy of 2, also stunning, little girls that I’ve had the privilege of spending time with. She works 4 days a week but has arranged it so that her husband and she can provide child care virtually on their own – I love it!! She’s very down to earth, has a great laugh and is someone who doesn’t make me feel as though I need to apologize after I’ve spoken my mind.

And then of course there’s me, ‘nough said.

Though we have similarities we are a fairly diverse group. I almost think it’s God ordained (I’m over spiritualizing a bit here) that we found each other. There have been nights that the mommies of the group have definitely shared great mommy stories we could all laugh about and other nights we’ve all told mother-in-law stories and then even more family dramas. The two of us without kids are ever grateful for having another kidless person in the group, but with that being said we so enjoy seeing and hearing all about the kiddos too. Instead we share our animal lovies and comment on our pet’s cute pictures more than other kid people normally would. What I love about this little group of ladies is that we get together having had no original commonalities, other than going to the same school for 4 years, and we still share, relate and laugh with one another.

I have been mentioning a lot lately about how we need to always be open to what could come our way when we aren’t expecting it, especially in regards to friendships. We had a great night together at a small town music fest and sidewalk sales, just walkin’ and talkin’, and eating ice cream (you have to eat at some point right?). Unfortunately, as what often happens, just as we ‘get into it’ (the great conversation), it feels like it’s over. A good, yet infrequent, visit reminds me a bit of sex. It doesn’t happen that often, but when it does it takes you a while to ‘get there’ and when you finally do it’s over way too soon! That was our visit Friday night – over way too soon. We’re hoping to fix this problem and get together one more time before September rolls around - I can’t wait!

But then again … does that surprise you?


Shell Bell said...

I am back again this do have me hooked! Love the insights....can't wait for Mango Salad!

S. said...

LOL, I will admit my moment of terror (having had a mostly un-fun time at school) when I initially heard there would be more people on our first visit. Connecting has been really wonderful and I'm grateful to know you all so much better now :) Funny how things work out!

Artsy said...

It's funny because I was nervous about how everyone was going to react to the first visit being with the group of us! I suspected everyone to be a little uncomfotable at first. I knew I would have been in that situation. I had no doubts about everyone getting along extremely well though!! You are a great bunch of girls who all have the same qualities I look for in a friend! I'm glad everyone accepted the invite and new friendships were made and old ones rekindled!!