Thursday, February 4, 2010

Super women

Women are super.

At least that's what I think.

They do it all.

Well many of them ... us.

Though I will confess I have said many times that I could never become a lesbian (aside from personal views perhaps) because I also think woman are crazy hormonal messes. All in all though ...they amaze me.

I bring this up as I strive to get back into a full time job as well as a full time household. I want to say first off that I have absolutely no earthly clue how women work full time and have kids. No idea. This by no means is a judgment just a mere wondering.

I shared with you how lately I have been overwhelmed by the 'catch up' around the apartment. Let me tell you, it builds up over a few months. This past week I was determined to try and get some of it done. Of course this was heading into a 53 hour work week.

Astoundingly I have made some real headway and am felling like a different person because of it. Instead of putting off little jobs, I've been tackling them when I've had the chance. I mentally feel much lighter and happier because of it.

However there's another side to the coin. When you get into the routine of HAVING to get the little job done, you often overlook the chance to catch some relaxation you may need.

I have an aunt (who I think could be reading this). Who has struggled with this for years. She's a mom of three grown children, who were born very close in age. She spent years as a home maker and mother raising them, until her husband was ill (he has kidney disease). Then when they were in their 'tween years she had to work outside of the home to help provide. It soon turned into full time and she then bore the weight of the household entirely on her shoulders.

Because her husband was sick she HAD to do it all: raise the children, cook, clean, work full time to provide, entertain company and so much more. In some ways this doesn't sounds all that earth shattering but if you knew how she completed all of these things you'd be astounded.

You see my idea of cooking in those conditions would be sidekicks with some chicken added, or mac 'n cheese with hot dogs. Not her, it was always a healthy well rounded dinner, a spotless home and to church on time.

I know she wouldn't necessarily say she did everything right and perhaps would do things a bit differently next time (she wore herself out). THe point is I think that we, as women, do it. Or at least we try.

I am by no means knocking men, I'm not a feminist either, but I find it very interesting how we as women feel the deep need to 'do it all'. Why?

I only recently witnessed my husband remotely concerned about the floors being vacuumed. I remember when Wally went to school we did everything we could so that he could concentrate entirely on his school work. After 5 or 6 months we quite working even part time at the barn. When I went to school I continued to clean, cook (as much as I could), work part time, do the laundry, do yard work, take out the garbage, deal with the animals and on and on.

Again, I am not saying men are lazy at all (though I'm probably not convincing you at this moment) just that they think so differently than us.

Their primary thoughts on their purpose in life is work, providing.From my experience, when they are focused it's on primarily one thing.

Women have a thousand and one things on the go at any given time.

I really had to learn to step back during my last semester and was amazed that Wally could indeed pick up the slack,in fact he was better at many things than I was.

I think we need to provide more opportunity to men to flex their multi-tasking abilities. We need to let go more and relax (even though I know that sometimes doing the dishes and getting the dusting done seem more relaxing at the time!)

I'm not sure where that all came from, but there you have it. You have my permission to rest!