I guess I'm home. At least that's what everyone is assuming.
When I decided to address the long lost dream I had to visit a different culture and observe an organization in action giving in some way to people in need of love (who isn't?) I had know idea what I was in for.
By this I don't mean the shock of a completely different country, language, customs, even food. When we were in Thailand I honestly wasn't shocked by much. As I've mentioned before I think I was ripe for the picking - whatever that means...
As I've been talking to people in person, via e-mail and on the phone, everyone starts out by passionately asking 'What was it like?!' I know that my incredibly excited attitude before the trip has much to do with it. The other part though is wanting to know what things were like.
Just today I was talking to someone and I got asked these questions. They wanted to know what was the biggest event? Did I get attached to any special child? What did it feel like to amongst such filth at the dump or see the begging children? Did it feel weird coming home to a nice house and things?
Comments like 'You just feel so bad for the people there', 'Poor people', 'You wish they had what we did', 'It's so sad' and on and on I could go.
Just before leaving Thailand I expressed many times how I didn't know how to go back ... to Canada. To North American culture that believes their way is the right way.
Don't get me wrong I have a greater appreciation than ever for the beautiful land I get to live in, the clean air, free health care, and more than I could ever need.
... except for one thing: perspective.
Just to make it clear I'm not saying we need to all go move to Thailand to gain perspective, that's ridiculous.
In fact contrary to the person I was conversing with today I DON'T think everyone in North America should necessarily go on a trip like this. (I'm not against it but I don't think it's a requirement in finding a great amount of perspective). In fact I kind of find it offensive (but I know I can't be that overly sensitive) that people think we went to do anything, or get a dramatic transformation.
I actually have pursued a dull, even keeled, realistic experience rather than the ever sought after mountain top conversation to simplicity.
I just wanted to see, learn and do right. That's all. (No, this doesn't make me better than anyone else).
I purposefully didn't connect on some deep level with any children or babies (although I admittedly conjured up some favourites).
I was there for a week!!!!!
How healthy would it be for either myself or the children for me to come in heart wide open ready to gobble up their love, only to give them nothing back in return but a 'That was great but I gotta go back to my abundantly great country and go on with my life now - later!'
I'm not saying that one shouldn't give of themselves and enjoy receiving some great time with the kids/babies, I just think if you are only ever planning on visiting once in your life you'd better be mindful of what you are doing, at least to some degree.
I have to say one of the challenges, for me, of only going for a week or so is that I'm an observer. Especially at the initiation point of any relationship. (Once that's over watch out!!).
When I did my placements at school one of the negative comments I got was my lack of immediate involvement. I did well after a few weeks but initially I stood back and assessed. Once I gained confidence everything was great, but apparently waiting to get that was a flaw.
At first I had a hard time with this character point. I got down on myself and felt bad. Now I see it as just a part of who I am and know that through this quality of observation I gained a wee bit of wisdom on how to deal with someone because I wanted to know them before trying to establish any sort of relationship with expectations on them.
Where am I going with this?
We were there a week. I had a week of observing and mild interactions. Ones that I savoured every moment of. Ones that now feel were a bit of a tease because I want more.
I went to Thailand to fulfill a dream. Not to discover a new one. But I did and this hurts right now.
Needless to say I'm finding it a great challenge to be 'home'. Not because of the nice house and things ....
What's the old saying? 'Home is where the heart is'
My heart is in Thailand.
Can someone mail it back please?
Monday, April 4, 2011
Sunday, April 3, 2011
How we got to where we were going...
I guesss it's time to share a bit more about our trip. THe beginning seems to be a great place to start.
Wally and I left our home around 3pm in the afternoon on the Friday before our flight. We decided since no one was knocking down our door with offers to take us to the airport we'd go early, sty at a hotel for the night, leave the car parked for the 2 weeks and get shuttled to the airport, giving us a few extra and needed hours of sleep.
We were very nervous about the shuttle being on time and everything working out, but it did and we were glad to be on the plane and off to Hong Kong.
Our first flight start to finish was apporx. 16 hrs. We actually did well on it. Other than feeling the normal grossness of long travel it was good. However I have to express how not so great it was to be flying with a serious sinus cold. Yikes!!! That was sooooooo incredibly painful upon descent - in fact I don't think I've ever eperienced such pain in my head before. Fortunately that was the worst of it and I didn't experience anything as bad as our first flight.
Our layover was only an hour and a bit after going through another security check and such then we were on our shorter 3 hr flight (which I must add felt like nothing in comparison).
Wally and I were comparing going to THailand as opposed to coming home and we agreed that there must be an adrenaline rush or something on your way somewhere beause the way home seemed torturously long and that was after we broke it us a lot mure!
Anyways, we must have been feeling pretty good because once we got off of the plane in Bangkok we knew the 'fun' would begin. We would then be completely responsible for getting from point A to point B with a language barrier between us.
We took a few moments to get ourselves figured out in the airport and discussed if we'd go with the original plan of staying at a guesthouse there in Bangkok for the night and fly out to Mae Sot in the morning or just suck it up and take the night bus and do the 8 hr trek through the night.
Shockingly we both agreed to take the night bus experience and get our travels all over in one shot.
So we threw our plan to the wind (I honestly can't believe we agreed together to do this!)and decided to get a cab to the Mo Chit bus station (pronounced Mo Shit - nice).
Unfortunately at the time of throwing plans to the wind we learned later that we threw a couple of notes of advice while using taxi services to the wind too.
We were directed by our friends to go to the lady at the counter to ensure a trustworthy ride.
We missed that. Oops.
But we were superexcited to find a cab so quickly- I mean they came right up to us, how great is that?! (Clearly we were virgin International travellers).
A lightbulb should've went off when along with our driver was his spindly, charming, conversation attempting side kick who learned all of our dirt on travelling. He made us feel so cared for. He was good. We were stupid.
We hop into the car and feel confident the driver knows where he's going.
Ok confident might be a strech. We hoped beyond all hopes he knew where he was going. We were startled by the traffic, the speed, tha lack of seat belts in the car and by the very broken English Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dumb had.
They conversed in I'm guessing Thai - who knows. This made me nervous. Were they plotting our abduction? Were they planning our death? Did they know where they were going? Or were they figuring out how to take us for all we were worth?
We would soon learn that the last one was their goal. What can I say, we were easy targets.
Our friends had prepared us with the cost of what the cab would be. Around 350 Baht. Not a bad price. They warned us about toll fees and all of that business. We felt good knowing what to expect. I had made sure to ask for a metered cab and was confident I'd passed the test, except for one thing .... I noticed that the meter wasn't changing. Hmmmmm does it usually change in front of us? How should I know, I have been in 2 cabs ever and they were in Quebec and I was with someone who knew what they were doing. Maybe this was different. I had a sinking feeling though and wished this one time I hadnt' kept my mouth shut.
After 20 - 30 minutes driving down the highway and a few toll booths. They finally reached what appeared to be my favourite bus station. Appeared to be. THere were people, there were buses, why should I wonder?
They parked to the side of a very busy street and said we were here. Then they asked for 2500 Baht. For those of you who don't know 350 B is around $12 Canadian, 2500 B is somewhere around $80 Canadian. Ummmmmm .... a wee bit of a difference.
I immediately said no. I told them that was ridiculously high and we knew how much we should have paid. They had our taxi virginity and knew we were foreign and unstable in our confidence. I continued to argue and bartar with them only moving down to 2000 B. Wally inerjected and tried his best to be the stern voice of reason but they had us. It was two charging taxi types against two people who hadn't the foresight to remember their instructions. We were getting nowhere in our arguments but heated and I have to say it was beginning to make me nervous (even though I continued insisting they were crazy!).
AFter a few minutes we gave them the 2000 B (NEVER would I do that again!!) if for nothign else to get our luggage back. They popped the truck and shooed us away. They didn't get out of the car to help or anything - I'd later learn that was a clear sign they were dirty dealers 9among a thousand other signs).
We barely missed getting hit by several speeding forms of transportation, seeing as we were litterally dropped off on the side of a highway.
We stumbled into the bus station relieved to be done with cabs for a while and at least where we needed to be. That is until I went up to the counter ...
I asked for 2 tickets to Mae Sot.
To which the well dressed counter lady looked at me with confusion and said 'Mo Chit - 2 kilometers'.
WHAT?!
I don't know which station we were at but it clearly wasn't Mo Chit.
Wally and I were tired and frustrated and terrified to get into another cab but we definitely couldn't stay at this tiny little station for the night that was nearly entirely outside with people everywhere.
We took a deep breath and went over to the cab overseer and said Mo Chit (as properly as we could). I made sure to find out ahead this time how much. 100 B, deal. I felt a wee bit better but still suspiscious of our driver. He was young, calm and not a talker. He did seem rather gentle though and just there to do his job. And he clearly was.
After a good 15-20 minute slow drive through snail moving traffic we understood why the other guy didn't want to waste his time on us. Once we got there I noticed the meter was only at 51 B. I didn't care one bit, it was the best 100 B we'd ever spent because the drived hopped out of hte cab, got our bags and was beyond courteous (ok maybe he was just doing his job but all those qualities jumped out at me since we had yet to see them in a cabby).
AFter having to stop for directions to the right counter we found it and I once again asked for '2 tickets to Mae Sot on the night bus'. The lady said 11:30pm which was actually a couple hrs past what we were told. After already not following the rules given for our protection I was a little hesitant but it was that or stay the night at the station or another cab ride to a guest house. We took a risk on the bus.
We purchased the last 2 tickets there were for the last bus going and finally felt like we may be getting somewhere. We made a trip to Thailand's favourite variety store, 7/11, and sat with our 3 shared chocolate bars to snack on (their chocolate bars are a third of the size of ours, we needed to compensate, no need to experience anymore culture shock).
Tehn it was time to use the bathroom ....
Wally was the first daring participant. AFter a minute or so he came back and said 'I need some money'.
I looked at him appauled. 'Why on earth do you need money to go to the bathroom?'
'It costs 3 B' he declares.
After an inappropriate conversation with myself over the issue in my head we found 3 B and off he went.
Then it was my turn. I took 3 B from Wally's famous money belt and off I went.
I paid my toll, went through the little thingamajig that you sometimes go through at a grocery store or the fair to let you in ... don't know if it has a name, and I went past the money ladies (who incidentally have their money set up on a little card table in front so there's no sneeking in).
I got into the toilet and realized there was no toilet paper. Geez.
Luckily I noticed before going because after that many hours of travel one needs all the help they can get in feeling clean and drip drying was not an option for me. I left the stall and asked someone about toilet paper and the lady sweetly smiled and pointed to the money ladies 'You buy' she said with pride over helping a completely lost foreigner.
I left to tell Wally and then realized he bought me a bunch of Kleenex for my very full sinus cavity and snuck back into the bathroom without the ladies noticing I'd escaped.
That crisis was averted.
We got comfortalbe on the cement floor of the indoor/outdoor bus station, joined by hundreds of others, mostly families on their way back to nowhere, where they lived.
We watched a cute little girl learning to walk with squeky shoes, two stray dogs meandering around the indoor part of the station and a little Thai Much Music.
As time went by we moved into the waiting area and watched the buses like hawks. Wally eased my fears everytime we saw our possible bus and asked to be sure if this was ours. After 2 we hadn't hit the jackpot. Finally third time was a charm. Even though the bud clearly stated it was going somewhere that wasn't Mae Sot and it was parked one terminal off from where it should have been it apparently was ours.
It was good Wally asked because it was nearly full and about to leave. When we took up our luggage there was no more room in the luggage compartment, which was interesting since no one had luggage only shopping purchases. For a few moments it seemed as though they may not take us due to our two suitcases. We were willing to do anything to get on that bus so when the driver ssaid we'd have to put the bags where our feet would go we didn't blink an eye.
We crawled up the double decker VIP bus which meant it was air conditioned and had large seats and under normal circumstances would have been comfortable. Not so much when your knees are resting behind your ears.
We didn't really care though because we were on a bus that would hopefully take us to where we were heading. We wouldn't be convinced until we arrived.
We both were able to get a couple of hours of sleep during the 8 hour voyage. I only had a couple of fits of coughing and a few nose blowing issues.
As we ventured through there was one stop when the driver got out, one military stop that ended in the family of three beside us being taken off (apparently they were Burmese and would be taken in and possibly sent back to Burma - not good).
We weaved through the mountains again and again, that's when it really hit me that we were indeed across the world from home. I momentarily wondered what the heck we were doing and if I was crazy.
I decided yes I was but that it would be ok.
When we finally arrived at the bus station in Mae Sot we got off and were by a wall of hot humid air.
We immediately decided to use the washroom. Wally first then me. I was proud we knew the system by now and had our 3 B ready (and my Kleenex).
What I wasn't ready for was what would later be described to me as a 'Squatty Pttty'. I was never warned about this.
As I looked at the unfamiliar invention I surveyed the possible procedure. Hmmmm ... did I have to got badly enough? I had already paid. I looked again all about it and noticed the ladel and water.
I couldn't do it. Not without a lengthy mental build up. I closed the door on the possiblitiy altogether and prayed to God that we'd find a way to where ever we were headed soon.
Just to refresh, at this point it's 7:15am and we are now at a point of not knowing what to do. We realize we have no idea how to use the phone and since we'd decided last minute to take the night bus we had no firmed up a pick up time with our hosts. I had spent $58 (I learned later) on an international call to my dad asking him to facebook my friend in Thailand who I hoped would be able to message our hostess in hopes that she would be there at some point ot meet us.
Not exactly a trustworthy, solid plan but we hoped.
I decided to try the phone. THe first try failed. THe second time I got through but got cut off because I should've added money every inute or something. The third try I spit out the remainder of 'we're here, pleasepick us up!' and was cut off again but I prayed she had enough info to go on.
Luckily I heard her say 'I'll be there in a half ....' so I had all the hope I needed to believe we'd be rescued. And around 8 am we met Steph our Compasio staff. (Whom we almost missed but didn't!).
Nothing can explain in words how glad we were to be found by someone we knew (even though we didn't really).
She took us over to a tuk tuk and began speaking what to me sounded like fluent Thai and explained where we needed to go and we hopped into our fourth new form of trasportation in several hours finally enjoying another new experience.
Ahhhhhh... Steph took us to our temporary home that we got to live in for the week and toured us around. She let me use her phone to call my friend A-bag to tell him we were there finally. I enjoyed the shocked sound of his voice and we then made a lunch date (that Wally and I woudl later sleep through).
We were sooooooo glad to be in Thailand with people we knew.
We showered, loving every second and laid down for unconscious sleep for 2 1/2 hrs.
It was divine.
And so ends the beginning of our journeys to Thai Thai.
After a hellish previous week and an interesting and very long journey there we had arrived.
Nothing could've felt better. Nothing.
Wally and I left our home around 3pm in the afternoon on the Friday before our flight. We decided since no one was knocking down our door with offers to take us to the airport we'd go early, sty at a hotel for the night, leave the car parked for the 2 weeks and get shuttled to the airport, giving us a few extra and needed hours of sleep.
We were very nervous about the shuttle being on time and everything working out, but it did and we were glad to be on the plane and off to Hong Kong.
Our first flight start to finish was apporx. 16 hrs. We actually did well on it. Other than feeling the normal grossness of long travel it was good. However I have to express how not so great it was to be flying with a serious sinus cold. Yikes!!! That was sooooooo incredibly painful upon descent - in fact I don't think I've ever eperienced such pain in my head before. Fortunately that was the worst of it and I didn't experience anything as bad as our first flight.
Our layover was only an hour and a bit after going through another security check and such then we were on our shorter 3 hr flight (which I must add felt like nothing in comparison).
Wally and I were comparing going to THailand as opposed to coming home and we agreed that there must be an adrenaline rush or something on your way somewhere beause the way home seemed torturously long and that was after we broke it us a lot mure!
Anyways, we must have been feeling pretty good because once we got off of the plane in Bangkok we knew the 'fun' would begin. We would then be completely responsible for getting from point A to point B with a language barrier between us.
We took a few moments to get ourselves figured out in the airport and discussed if we'd go with the original plan of staying at a guesthouse there in Bangkok for the night and fly out to Mae Sot in the morning or just suck it up and take the night bus and do the 8 hr trek through the night.
Shockingly we both agreed to take the night bus experience and get our travels all over in one shot.
So we threw our plan to the wind (I honestly can't believe we agreed together to do this!)and decided to get a cab to the Mo Chit bus station (pronounced Mo Shit - nice).
Unfortunately at the time of throwing plans to the wind we learned later that we threw a couple of notes of advice while using taxi services to the wind too.
We were directed by our friends to go to the lady at the counter to ensure a trustworthy ride.
We missed that. Oops.
But we were superexcited to find a cab so quickly- I mean they came right up to us, how great is that?! (Clearly we were virgin International travellers).
A lightbulb should've went off when along with our driver was his spindly, charming, conversation attempting side kick who learned all of our dirt on travelling. He made us feel so cared for. He was good. We were stupid.
We hop into the car and feel confident the driver knows where he's going.
Ok confident might be a strech. We hoped beyond all hopes he knew where he was going. We were startled by the traffic, the speed, tha lack of seat belts in the car and by the very broken English Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dumb had.
They conversed in I'm guessing Thai - who knows. This made me nervous. Were they plotting our abduction? Were they planning our death? Did they know where they were going? Or were they figuring out how to take us for all we were worth?
We would soon learn that the last one was their goal. What can I say, we were easy targets.
Our friends had prepared us with the cost of what the cab would be. Around 350 Baht. Not a bad price. They warned us about toll fees and all of that business. We felt good knowing what to expect. I had made sure to ask for a metered cab and was confident I'd passed the test, except for one thing .... I noticed that the meter wasn't changing. Hmmmmm does it usually change in front of us? How should I know, I have been in 2 cabs ever and they were in Quebec and I was with someone who knew what they were doing. Maybe this was different. I had a sinking feeling though and wished this one time I hadnt' kept my mouth shut.
After 20 - 30 minutes driving down the highway and a few toll booths. They finally reached what appeared to be my favourite bus station. Appeared to be. THere were people, there were buses, why should I wonder?
They parked to the side of a very busy street and said we were here. Then they asked for 2500 Baht. For those of you who don't know 350 B is around $12 Canadian, 2500 B is somewhere around $80 Canadian. Ummmmmm .... a wee bit of a difference.
I immediately said no. I told them that was ridiculously high and we knew how much we should have paid. They had our taxi virginity and knew we were foreign and unstable in our confidence. I continued to argue and bartar with them only moving down to 2000 B. Wally inerjected and tried his best to be the stern voice of reason but they had us. It was two charging taxi types against two people who hadn't the foresight to remember their instructions. We were getting nowhere in our arguments but heated and I have to say it was beginning to make me nervous (even though I continued insisting they were crazy!).
AFter a few minutes we gave them the 2000 B (NEVER would I do that again!!) if for nothign else to get our luggage back. They popped the truck and shooed us away. They didn't get out of the car to help or anything - I'd later learn that was a clear sign they were dirty dealers 9among a thousand other signs).
We barely missed getting hit by several speeding forms of transportation, seeing as we were litterally dropped off on the side of a highway.
We stumbled into the bus station relieved to be done with cabs for a while and at least where we needed to be. That is until I went up to the counter ...
I asked for 2 tickets to Mae Sot.
To which the well dressed counter lady looked at me with confusion and said 'Mo Chit - 2 kilometers'.
WHAT?!
I don't know which station we were at but it clearly wasn't Mo Chit.
Wally and I were tired and frustrated and terrified to get into another cab but we definitely couldn't stay at this tiny little station for the night that was nearly entirely outside with people everywhere.
We took a deep breath and went over to the cab overseer and said Mo Chit (as properly as we could). I made sure to find out ahead this time how much. 100 B, deal. I felt a wee bit better but still suspiscious of our driver. He was young, calm and not a talker. He did seem rather gentle though and just there to do his job. And he clearly was.
After a good 15-20 minute slow drive through snail moving traffic we understood why the other guy didn't want to waste his time on us. Once we got there I noticed the meter was only at 51 B. I didn't care one bit, it was the best 100 B we'd ever spent because the drived hopped out of hte cab, got our bags and was beyond courteous (ok maybe he was just doing his job but all those qualities jumped out at me since we had yet to see them in a cabby).
AFter having to stop for directions to the right counter we found it and I once again asked for '2 tickets to Mae Sot on the night bus'. The lady said 11:30pm which was actually a couple hrs past what we were told. After already not following the rules given for our protection I was a little hesitant but it was that or stay the night at the station or another cab ride to a guest house. We took a risk on the bus.
We purchased the last 2 tickets there were for the last bus going and finally felt like we may be getting somewhere. We made a trip to Thailand's favourite variety store, 7/11, and sat with our 3 shared chocolate bars to snack on (their chocolate bars are a third of the size of ours, we needed to compensate, no need to experience anymore culture shock).
Tehn it was time to use the bathroom ....
Wally was the first daring participant. AFter a minute or so he came back and said 'I need some money'.
I looked at him appauled. 'Why on earth do you need money to go to the bathroom?'
'It costs 3 B' he declares.
After an inappropriate conversation with myself over the issue in my head we found 3 B and off he went.
Then it was my turn. I took 3 B from Wally's famous money belt and off I went.
I paid my toll, went through the little thingamajig that you sometimes go through at a grocery store or the fair to let you in ... don't know if it has a name, and I went past the money ladies (who incidentally have their money set up on a little card table in front so there's no sneeking in).
I got into the toilet and realized there was no toilet paper. Geez.
Luckily I noticed before going because after that many hours of travel one needs all the help they can get in feeling clean and drip drying was not an option for me. I left the stall and asked someone about toilet paper and the lady sweetly smiled and pointed to the money ladies 'You buy' she said with pride over helping a completely lost foreigner.
I left to tell Wally and then realized he bought me a bunch of Kleenex for my very full sinus cavity and snuck back into the bathroom without the ladies noticing I'd escaped.
That crisis was averted.
We got comfortalbe on the cement floor of the indoor/outdoor bus station, joined by hundreds of others, mostly families on their way back to nowhere, where they lived.
We watched a cute little girl learning to walk with squeky shoes, two stray dogs meandering around the indoor part of the station and a little Thai Much Music.
As time went by we moved into the waiting area and watched the buses like hawks. Wally eased my fears everytime we saw our possible bus and asked to be sure if this was ours. After 2 we hadn't hit the jackpot. Finally third time was a charm. Even though the bud clearly stated it was going somewhere that wasn't Mae Sot and it was parked one terminal off from where it should have been it apparently was ours.
It was good Wally asked because it was nearly full and about to leave. When we took up our luggage there was no more room in the luggage compartment, which was interesting since no one had luggage only shopping purchases. For a few moments it seemed as though they may not take us due to our two suitcases. We were willing to do anything to get on that bus so when the driver ssaid we'd have to put the bags where our feet would go we didn't blink an eye.
We crawled up the double decker VIP bus which meant it was air conditioned and had large seats and under normal circumstances would have been comfortable. Not so much when your knees are resting behind your ears.
We didn't really care though because we were on a bus that would hopefully take us to where we were heading. We wouldn't be convinced until we arrived.
We both were able to get a couple of hours of sleep during the 8 hour voyage. I only had a couple of fits of coughing and a few nose blowing issues.
As we ventured through there was one stop when the driver got out, one military stop that ended in the family of three beside us being taken off (apparently they were Burmese and would be taken in and possibly sent back to Burma - not good).
We weaved through the mountains again and again, that's when it really hit me that we were indeed across the world from home. I momentarily wondered what the heck we were doing and if I was crazy.
I decided yes I was but that it would be ok.
When we finally arrived at the bus station in Mae Sot we got off and were by a wall of hot humid air.
We immediately decided to use the washroom. Wally first then me. I was proud we knew the system by now and had our 3 B ready (and my Kleenex).
What I wasn't ready for was what would later be described to me as a 'Squatty Pttty'. I was never warned about this.
As I looked at the unfamiliar invention I surveyed the possible procedure. Hmmmm ... did I have to got badly enough? I had already paid. I looked again all about it and noticed the ladel and water.
I couldn't do it. Not without a lengthy mental build up. I closed the door on the possiblitiy altogether and prayed to God that we'd find a way to where ever we were headed soon.
Just to refresh, at this point it's 7:15am and we are now at a point of not knowing what to do. We realize we have no idea how to use the phone and since we'd decided last minute to take the night bus we had no firmed up a pick up time with our hosts. I had spent $58 (I learned later) on an international call to my dad asking him to facebook my friend in Thailand who I hoped would be able to message our hostess in hopes that she would be there at some point ot meet us.
Not exactly a trustworthy, solid plan but we hoped.
I decided to try the phone. THe first try failed. THe second time I got through but got cut off because I should've added money every inute or something. The third try I spit out the remainder of 'we're here, pleasepick us up!' and was cut off again but I prayed she had enough info to go on.
Luckily I heard her say 'I'll be there in a half ....' so I had all the hope I needed to believe we'd be rescued. And around 8 am we met Steph our Compasio staff. (Whom we almost missed but didn't!).
Nothing can explain in words how glad we were to be found by someone we knew (even though we didn't really).
She took us over to a tuk tuk and began speaking what to me sounded like fluent Thai and explained where we needed to go and we hopped into our fourth new form of trasportation in several hours finally enjoying another new experience.
Ahhhhhh... Steph took us to our temporary home that we got to live in for the week and toured us around. She let me use her phone to call my friend A-bag to tell him we were there finally. I enjoyed the shocked sound of his voice and we then made a lunch date (that Wally and I woudl later sleep through).
We were sooooooo glad to be in Thailand with people we knew.
We showered, loving every second and laid down for unconscious sleep for 2 1/2 hrs.
It was divine.
And so ends the beginning of our journeys to Thai Thai.
After a hellish previous week and an interesting and very long journey there we had arrived.
Nothing could've felt better. Nothing.
Friday, April 1, 2011
We're back!
That's right, we're finally home after a shorter 31 hour start to finish trek home from Bangkok (shorter than the 39 hr trip start to finish trip from our house to Mae Sot that is).
It's 7 am our time and we just went to bed 1 am-ish our time last night. Needless to say I'm tired still but trying to calm my stomach that is less than impressed with the intensely disgusting airplane food (and I say that with tremendous guilt considering how I saw children begging in the streets where I was and how they were delighted to eat the chicken foot when served lunch - clearly one doesn't necessarily change over night).
At the time of writing this I cannot lie about how I'm feeling.
What's that you ask?
Normal. The same. ('Same same' as the Thai would say). Unspectacularly similar to what I did two weeks ago.
However in saying this (as not to disappoint those who have closely followed our journey), I think it's an honest reaction for someone who has deliberately tried to stay 'grounded' (excuse the pun) during a rather extraordinarily over the top sort of experience.
I went from wearing a seat belt on the way to the airport in Canada to riding in the back of a tuk tuk with only my hand on a bar to hold me in, in a matter of several hours.
From peeing in a sparkling clean (yes ladies, I will now blanket statement the fact that ALL public bathrooms in North America, excluding perhaps a handful, are indeed sparkling clean comparatively), toilet paper provided for free, you can sit down and pee at leisure, you don't have to pay 3 baht to use, and you can flush with the push of a lever, to all of the opposite of these descriptions within hours.
From walking down my street with nary a person in site, to begging children with dirty faces holding snot exploding babies (to ensure they get as much as they can for their day's work - for holding the baby, not for the snot explosion).
In the wee span of 36-39 hrs I went from sharing my bathroom with only Wally to sharing it with a pet gecko (well, we made the most of it and said he was our pet and named him Gerard or something).
We went from feeling safe in the confines of strict traffic laws to saying a prayer every time we found ourselves on a main street with several other believed to be valid forms of transportation while using the opposite sides of the road than we were used to.
I could go on and on and on ...
And though it sounds like I'm describing another planet in a way (if you aren't convinced I have not doubt I could with a few more of my observations), I'm only describing the somewhat remote town we visited that is pretty much on the other side of the world. But still, the 'same same' world.
Despite experiencing these vast differences in a very short period of time, somehow I have been able to reconcile it and go mostly unscathed.
I am very unsure how I feel about my reaction.
Part of me feels that I should be home and completely inside out with grief. Upside down with determination to 'Free Burma!!', and a fireball of exhilaration at the fact that I was able to see first hand all that I did.
Instead I feel peculiarly 'normal' in every possible North American sense that I can. This admittedly startles the crap out of me and relieves me at the same time.
It startles me because I wonder where my heart and soul might be hibernating.
It relieves me because I feel as though I have a glimmer of hope that I've processed some of what I saw realistically and with some scant amount of wisdom and respect for the people I was lucky enough to see and meet.
I seem more comfortable than I believe I should in my country and my house so soon after what I experienced. Yet with it I still hold onto two (of many) of the biggest lessons Wally and I together feel as though we learned. (To be disclosed later).
Life changing lessons. One's that hopefully will meet us and teach us even as we sit on our comfortable couch, in our comfortable living room, in our comfortable house, in our extraordinarily comfortable neighbourhood.
We can hope.
And when these lessons decide to take us to the next phase of learning we pray earnestly that we will be ready for the lessons that will make us a little bit uncomfortable. Although I have other thoughts on this too...
I hope to share a few photos and more over several stories. For myself, I'd like to write a picture for you of our entire journey. I have no doubt that if you read you may get bored of some of the 'we did this and this and then this ...' that might pop up, but amongst the everyday life we lived there were many little stories, big observances and interesting interactions.
If you get a downer feeling from this post I apologize. I feel as though the experience of Thai Thai was so ripe and ready for me that what I observed shall bless me over and over daily with a more subtle long lasting effect.
It was AN experience of a life time that is a gateway to many more experiences of a lifetime. I look forward to sharing it with you and seeing where this leads ...
Khob-kun-Ka Thailand.
Khob-kun-Ka.
It's 7 am our time and we just went to bed 1 am-ish our time last night. Needless to say I'm tired still but trying to calm my stomach that is less than impressed with the intensely disgusting airplane food (and I say that with tremendous guilt considering how I saw children begging in the streets where I was and how they were delighted to eat the chicken foot when served lunch - clearly one doesn't necessarily change over night).
At the time of writing this I cannot lie about how I'm feeling.
What's that you ask?
Normal. The same. ('Same same' as the Thai would say). Unspectacularly similar to what I did two weeks ago.
However in saying this (as not to disappoint those who have closely followed our journey), I think it's an honest reaction for someone who has deliberately tried to stay 'grounded' (excuse the pun) during a rather extraordinarily over the top sort of experience.
I went from wearing a seat belt on the way to the airport in Canada to riding in the back of a tuk tuk with only my hand on a bar to hold me in, in a matter of several hours.
From peeing in a sparkling clean (yes ladies, I will now blanket statement the fact that ALL public bathrooms in North America, excluding perhaps a handful, are indeed sparkling clean comparatively), toilet paper provided for free, you can sit down and pee at leisure, you don't have to pay 3 baht to use, and you can flush with the push of a lever, to all of the opposite of these descriptions within hours.
From walking down my street with nary a person in site, to begging children with dirty faces holding snot exploding babies (to ensure they get as much as they can for their day's work - for holding the baby, not for the snot explosion).
In the wee span of 36-39 hrs I went from sharing my bathroom with only Wally to sharing it with a pet gecko (well, we made the most of it and said he was our pet and named him Gerard or something).
We went from feeling safe in the confines of strict traffic laws to saying a prayer every time we found ourselves on a main street with several other believed to be valid forms of transportation while using the opposite sides of the road than we were used to.
I could go on and on and on ...
And though it sounds like I'm describing another planet in a way (if you aren't convinced I have not doubt I could with a few more of my observations), I'm only describing the somewhat remote town we visited that is pretty much on the other side of the world. But still, the 'same same' world.
Despite experiencing these vast differences in a very short period of time, somehow I have been able to reconcile it and go mostly unscathed.
I am very unsure how I feel about my reaction.
Part of me feels that I should be home and completely inside out with grief. Upside down with determination to 'Free Burma!!', and a fireball of exhilaration at the fact that I was able to see first hand all that I did.
Instead I feel peculiarly 'normal' in every possible North American sense that I can. This admittedly startles the crap out of me and relieves me at the same time.
It startles me because I wonder where my heart and soul might be hibernating.
It relieves me because I feel as though I have a glimmer of hope that I've processed some of what I saw realistically and with some scant amount of wisdom and respect for the people I was lucky enough to see and meet.
I seem more comfortable than I believe I should in my country and my house so soon after what I experienced. Yet with it I still hold onto two (of many) of the biggest lessons Wally and I together feel as though we learned. (To be disclosed later).
Life changing lessons. One's that hopefully will meet us and teach us even as we sit on our comfortable couch, in our comfortable living room, in our comfortable house, in our extraordinarily comfortable neighbourhood.
We can hope.
And when these lessons decide to take us to the next phase of learning we pray earnestly that we will be ready for the lessons that will make us a little bit uncomfortable. Although I have other thoughts on this too...
I hope to share a few photos and more over several stories. For myself, I'd like to write a picture for you of our entire journey. I have no doubt that if you read you may get bored of some of the 'we did this and this and then this ...' that might pop up, but amongst the everyday life we lived there were many little stories, big observances and interesting interactions.
If you get a downer feeling from this post I apologize. I feel as though the experience of Thai Thai was so ripe and ready for me that what I observed shall bless me over and over daily with a more subtle long lasting effect.
It was AN experience of a life time that is a gateway to many more experiences of a lifetime. I look forward to sharing it with you and seeing where this leads ...
Khob-kun-Ka Thailand.
Khob-kun-Ka.
Friday, March 18, 2011
On our way!
Well soon, soon!!!
I really shouldn't be blogging when our plan is to leave the house in 3 hrs and we still have a list to finish. Buuuuuuuut .... you know.
Things I've done this morning...
* After telling Wally I finally have a good 7 hrs of sleep he replied 'Yeah, I know. Your nose sounded like a socket wrench all night long.' He then jumped out of bed, found a socket wrench and demonstrated how annoying I sounded.
* Even though we really had no extra time today we decided to have clean pancakes. at breakfast as I went to have a drink of water Wally raised his water glass and we toasted to our trip!
* I have taken disgusting medicine for my engine nose and now congested chest. I'm not sure whether I'm glad my ears are plugged or not.
* My parents came and picked up our doglets. Wally was sad he didn't get a chance to pet them good bye.
* I did a mountain of dishes. Folded laundry. Collected garbage and recycling. Cleaned out the fridge. And sorted coins for deposit to Compasio
* I played 'Don't you dare eat your poo' with Sweet, who seemed to LOVE me yelling at him and standing in front of his 'treat'.
* Wrote out instructions for dog sitters
What we still need to do....
* finish packing
* change my purse
* make the final donation deposit at the bank then do it online.
* Get traveler's cheques
* shower and get rid of the VERY entertaining nest on my head
* print out all of our hotel info. and a couple of informative e-mails
* e-mail dog sitters
* pray my cold goes away.
And ... likely another dozen things. Soooooo, I'd better get going!
To anyone that has made a donation towards my goal of $10 000 for Compasio, THANK YOU!!! We are nearly a third of the way there (including cheques that don't come up on my link)!!!
I will enjoy for you seeing where it is actually going and the people that are benefiting from it. God Bless you for giving of yourself!
Well, this is it for a while. Pray, pray, pray for safety, healing, fun and positive outcomes!
Cheers!
Eva :)
I really shouldn't be blogging when our plan is to leave the house in 3 hrs and we still have a list to finish. Buuuuuuuut .... you know.
Things I've done this morning...
* After telling Wally I finally have a good 7 hrs of sleep he replied 'Yeah, I know. Your nose sounded like a socket wrench all night long.' He then jumped out of bed, found a socket wrench and demonstrated how annoying I sounded.
* Even though we really had no extra time today we decided to have clean pancakes. at breakfast as I went to have a drink of water Wally raised his water glass and we toasted to our trip!
* I have taken disgusting medicine for my engine nose and now congested chest. I'm not sure whether I'm glad my ears are plugged or not.
* My parents came and picked up our doglets. Wally was sad he didn't get a chance to pet them good bye.
* I did a mountain of dishes. Folded laundry. Collected garbage and recycling. Cleaned out the fridge. And sorted coins for deposit to Compasio
* I played 'Don't you dare eat your poo' with Sweet, who seemed to LOVE me yelling at him and standing in front of his 'treat'.
* Wrote out instructions for dog sitters
What we still need to do....
* finish packing
* change my purse
* make the final donation deposit at the bank then do it online.
* Get traveler's cheques
* shower and get rid of the VERY entertaining nest on my head
* print out all of our hotel info. and a couple of informative e-mails
* e-mail dog sitters
* pray my cold goes away.
And ... likely another dozen things. Soooooo, I'd better get going!
To anyone that has made a donation towards my goal of $10 000 for Compasio, THANK YOU!!! We are nearly a third of the way there (including cheques that don't come up on my link)!!!
I will enjoy for you seeing where it is actually going and the people that are benefiting from it. God Bless you for giving of yourself!
Well, this is it for a while. Pray, pray, pray for safety, healing, fun and positive outcomes!
Cheers!
Eva :)
Thursday, March 17, 2011
A roller coaster ride.
I'm going to warn you in advance that the following MAY or MAY NOT sound like a bitchfest. Feel free to quit reading now if you'd like.
Though I must keep in perspective all things that are happening in the world like tsunamis, hunger, disease, displacement, and a myriad of other horrible things that I'm not experiencing, at the same time I will selfishly go on to vent about my ultimately NOT big problems (in the grand scheme of the world) but what have accumulated to being a snowball of strife in my life this week.
The best way I can describe it in one word is: roller coaster.
Basically about 4 or 5 small to medium stressors have joined their forces to try and push me over the edge. Essentially, they have been successfull.
I struggle often with knowing what to share, with knowing how much I want people whom I know but don't necessarily know are reading, to know. At 3:30am I don't care, so here she goes...
The 'Bank Fiasco' ensued. A continued cat and mouse game of back and forth calls, getting 'You're taxes are late!!' notices (after dealing with it already once a month ago - AND being promised all would be fine). Combined with improper mortgage payments. Combined with what I will further elaborate on...
The 'Nasal Conundrum'. I woke up Tuesday morning with a steam engine coming out of my left nostril (as mentioned before), paired with a constant drip out of the same fore mentioned nostril, causing me to have to blow my nose 45 000 times a day. Now my ears are plugged, my throat has gone from sore to scratchy and I seem to be choking on everything. I don't know what that's about.
The 'Sleep Deprivation From Hell' Episodes (the 'it's not from having a newborn' variety). I think it's been 6 of the last 7 days of disturbed sleep for reasons mentioned above and ones still to come. I believe this one is the root of most evil that binds the rest of the problems together and turns me into the scariest human on earth. Or at least one with questionable sanity.
The 'The Trip's Off!!' saga. Due to vast differences in beliefs in what is safe Wally and I have had numerous disputes resulting in psychotic episodes of crazy cry-yelling (on my part) and moments of absolute despair on both of our parts, each wondering 'WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU THINKING?! YOU CAN'T BE SERIOUS?!'. I think 3 different issues have arisen where the trip (yes even AFTER purchasing the tickets) has almost been vetoed.
The 'Oh My Goodness We're Pregnant!!!' drama. Something that has contributed to each of the other series in some manner, making them more dramatic and intense than they normally would have been. Only to find out that we are NOT pregnant. There are many mixed emotions surrounding this. Ultimately we see how it is the best thing by far right now (especially with the trip), and it was not 'in the plan' (but really, what great things are ever 'in the plan'). Needless to say this was the bumpiest part of the ride.
The 'Just-in-case-I-won't-take-drugs-for-anything' Dilemma. I think this is self explanatory.
And finally, the 'Traveling Across the World!' situation. Foreign experience, foreign language, foreign money, foreign everything which then equals two edgy people. Although I will admit I seem far more relaxed than I probably should be. (Wally asks me at least a couple times a day: 'Aren't you scared?' to which I say 'If I stop and really think about it yes. So I don't stop and really think about it. We'll be fine.') He shouldn't be worried, he's thought of everything from registering us with the government for traveling, to money belts (thank God he gave up on the fanny pack!), to printing out and handing me a 'what to do if you get incarcerated' form. I believe the last thing was just for me.
Each of these things on their own would likely be manageable and not that big of a deal (except the sleep, it always turns things bad), but together they have been a mini nightmare.
I said to Wally last night 'I've never had to fight so hard for something before'. It seems the more you want something the harder it is to get.
I always think of couples involved in hard core fertility treatments and wonder 'Wow, I could never do that. I just don't want my own biological baby bad enough. Why put yourself through it? Just give up and adopt one.' But, the same could be said for me 'Why do you have to have to go across the world to learn from the needy? (As I say that I MUST add that I use that term in reference to how the world as a whole looks at financially poor people not necessarily how I view their value). Why not learn from the ones in your own city?
I don't know. I just feel like stepping out of the culture hits you differently. I want to be hit differently. In a way maybe I couldn't learn on my own here and now, but maybe could better on and after the trip. (Who knows, I'm just guessing).
I honestly didn't really realize how deeply the desire was for this trip until after I thought I was pregnant and realized risks that would be associated IF I acquired some disease like Malaria. I didn't care. Not one bit. I still wanted to go with faith that I'd be just fine. Not caring that I could have a baby physically less able (although this is a risk anytime, anywhere) if I went and did catch something. (Not that it would mean the end of the world but why do something that you know affects more than yourself and puts someone at risk when they don't need to be).
I didn't care. I could only see my dream. My goal. Of experiencing something that will hopefully change my life, throughout the rest of my life.
I know it's good to have faith, it's also good to have sense. I'm not sure which would have won.
Luckily, in my opinion I don't have to worry about this issue now and I can go freely and hopefully with joy.
I'm a little sad that this week has been so negative and full of ups and downs. Wally said to me last night that maybe it was so that by the time we got on the plane I'd love every minute of the very long flights because it was away from those things that stressed me out and it would finally give me a chance to be excited. 2 days traveling is a long time to have just be excited.
My prayer is that my nose engine dies and that tomorrow night and the night after I sleep like a baby and wake up rejuvenated and ready to make the trip.
It's funny, at this point I don't even know what to expect from it. I don't even really know why we're going. I'm not sure we'll be of much use. People assume we are going to serve and of course we really hope that we can at any capacity. However, to be honest, I'm going for me. Just me.
I'm going to be changed (I hope). I'm going to learn. I'm going to experience. I'm going to see. I'm going to hopefully be jolted into reality and reminded of what life is all about. I'm going to get more than give. I have no doubt the people there have far more to offer me than the other way around. I have no assumptions of the contrary.
I ask you again to pray (or whatever you do). For healing of my body and of my soul. For perspective and joy. For Wally and I to remember again why we chose each other 10 years ago next week. For renewed love for the One that gave me this dream.
I'm one work day away.
Let it be filled with wonder just as a reminder that the trip is extra not essential to my learning.
You know, so I come back.
At least for a while.
Though I must keep in perspective all things that are happening in the world like tsunamis, hunger, disease, displacement, and a myriad of other horrible things that I'm not experiencing, at the same time I will selfishly go on to vent about my ultimately NOT big problems (in the grand scheme of the world) but what have accumulated to being a snowball of strife in my life this week.
The best way I can describe it in one word is: roller coaster.
Basically about 4 or 5 small to medium stressors have joined their forces to try and push me over the edge. Essentially, they have been successfull.
I struggle often with knowing what to share, with knowing how much I want people whom I know but don't necessarily know are reading, to know. At 3:30am I don't care, so here she goes...
The 'Bank Fiasco' ensued. A continued cat and mouse game of back and forth calls, getting 'You're taxes are late!!' notices (after dealing with it already once a month ago - AND being promised all would be fine). Combined with improper mortgage payments. Combined with what I will further elaborate on...
The 'Nasal Conundrum'. I woke up Tuesday morning with a steam engine coming out of my left nostril (as mentioned before), paired with a constant drip out of the same fore mentioned nostril, causing me to have to blow my nose 45 000 times a day. Now my ears are plugged, my throat has gone from sore to scratchy and I seem to be choking on everything. I don't know what that's about.
The 'Sleep Deprivation From Hell' Episodes (the 'it's not from having a newborn' variety). I think it's been 6 of the last 7 days of disturbed sleep for reasons mentioned above and ones still to come. I believe this one is the root of most evil that binds the rest of the problems together and turns me into the scariest human on earth. Or at least one with questionable sanity.
The 'The Trip's Off!!' saga. Due to vast differences in beliefs in what is safe Wally and I have had numerous disputes resulting in psychotic episodes of crazy cry-yelling (on my part) and moments of absolute despair on both of our parts, each wondering 'WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU THINKING?! YOU CAN'T BE SERIOUS?!'. I think 3 different issues have arisen where the trip (yes even AFTER purchasing the tickets) has almost been vetoed.
The 'Oh My Goodness We're Pregnant!!!' drama. Something that has contributed to each of the other series in some manner, making them more dramatic and intense than they normally would have been. Only to find out that we are NOT pregnant. There are many mixed emotions surrounding this. Ultimately we see how it is the best thing by far right now (especially with the trip), and it was not 'in the plan' (but really, what great things are ever 'in the plan'). Needless to say this was the bumpiest part of the ride.
The 'Just-in-case-I-won't-take-drugs-for-anything' Dilemma. I think this is self explanatory.
And finally, the 'Traveling Across the World!' situation. Foreign experience, foreign language, foreign money, foreign everything which then equals two edgy people. Although I will admit I seem far more relaxed than I probably should be. (Wally asks me at least a couple times a day: 'Aren't you scared?' to which I say 'If I stop and really think about it yes. So I don't stop and really think about it. We'll be fine.') He shouldn't be worried, he's thought of everything from registering us with the government for traveling, to money belts (thank God he gave up on the fanny pack!), to printing out and handing me a 'what to do if you get incarcerated' form. I believe the last thing was just for me.
Each of these things on their own would likely be manageable and not that big of a deal (except the sleep, it always turns things bad), but together they have been a mini nightmare.
I said to Wally last night 'I've never had to fight so hard for something before'. It seems the more you want something the harder it is to get.
I always think of couples involved in hard core fertility treatments and wonder 'Wow, I could never do that. I just don't want my own biological baby bad enough. Why put yourself through it? Just give up and adopt one.' But, the same could be said for me 'Why do you have to have to go across the world to learn from the needy? (As I say that I MUST add that I use that term in reference to how the world as a whole looks at financially poor people not necessarily how I view their value). Why not learn from the ones in your own city?
I don't know. I just feel like stepping out of the culture hits you differently. I want to be hit differently. In a way maybe I couldn't learn on my own here and now, but maybe could better on and after the trip. (Who knows, I'm just guessing).
I honestly didn't really realize how deeply the desire was for this trip until after I thought I was pregnant and realized risks that would be associated IF I acquired some disease like Malaria. I didn't care. Not one bit. I still wanted to go with faith that I'd be just fine. Not caring that I could have a baby physically less able (although this is a risk anytime, anywhere) if I went and did catch something. (Not that it would mean the end of the world but why do something that you know affects more than yourself and puts someone at risk when they don't need to be).
I didn't care. I could only see my dream. My goal. Of experiencing something that will hopefully change my life, throughout the rest of my life.
I know it's good to have faith, it's also good to have sense. I'm not sure which would have won.
Luckily, in my opinion I don't have to worry about this issue now and I can go freely and hopefully with joy.
I'm a little sad that this week has been so negative and full of ups and downs. Wally said to me last night that maybe it was so that by the time we got on the plane I'd love every minute of the very long flights because it was away from those things that stressed me out and it would finally give me a chance to be excited. 2 days traveling is a long time to have just be excited.
My prayer is that my nose engine dies and that tomorrow night and the night after I sleep like a baby and wake up rejuvenated and ready to make the trip.
It's funny, at this point I don't even know what to expect from it. I don't even really know why we're going. I'm not sure we'll be of much use. People assume we are going to serve and of course we really hope that we can at any capacity. However, to be honest, I'm going for me. Just me.
I'm going to be changed (I hope). I'm going to learn. I'm going to experience. I'm going to see. I'm going to hopefully be jolted into reality and reminded of what life is all about. I'm going to get more than give. I have no doubt the people there have far more to offer me than the other way around. I have no assumptions of the contrary.
I ask you again to pray (or whatever you do). For healing of my body and of my soul. For perspective and joy. For Wally and I to remember again why we chose each other 10 years ago next week. For renewed love for the One that gave me this dream.
I'm one work day away.
Let it be filled with wonder just as a reminder that the trip is extra not essential to my learning.
You know, so I come back.
At least for a while.
Tuesday, March 15, 2011
Razor blades and drool
Well, we only have 4 more sleeps until out flight and only 3 more until we leave to begin our trip!
I have not slept well at all three out of four of the past nights. And as I suspected yesterday I have a sore throat, stuffy/runny nose and crazy emotions due to sleep deprivation.
Once I finally drifted off around 3ish I went in and out of sleep at different points noticing the constant changing state of affairs going on in my head.
I tried laying on my stomach only to drool on my pillow and wake myself up. I'd flip over and begin breathing out of my mouth only to nearly choke on the dryness of it.
Early on I was relieved that I could at least breathe, until later when I tried to stop mouth breathing and felt suffocated by whatever was blocking my nasal passage. Not to mention the razor blades in my throat.
After talking (whining) to Wally early on I almost burst into tears at the thought of working the next three days feeling so yucky (clearly I feel like I'm psychic to think I will feel terrible for the rest of the week). How in the world was I going to do a bajillion hour trip with such a long first flight. The thought overwhelmed me.
However, at some point after breakfast, after Wally left for the day I decided to just swallow my feelings and decide to be as positive as I could possibly muster. Being depressed doesn't help anyone.
So here I sit in the sun light, in my favourite chair preparing to go out to pick up a couple things, get the last load of laundry done for our trip and make a couple of phone calls. I have a couple of hours to get stuff done and maybe squeeze in 'relax' time before my nine hour day (that I'm praying goes off without a hitch).
If you are a prayer, please do. Regarding both my health, Wally's too and for a safe and easy travels.
There is a whole other prayer request for when we finally get there. That we might have our eyes opened and hearts changed in great ways.
Cheers!
I have not slept well at all three out of four of the past nights. And as I suspected yesterday I have a sore throat, stuffy/runny nose and crazy emotions due to sleep deprivation.
Once I finally drifted off around 3ish I went in and out of sleep at different points noticing the constant changing state of affairs going on in my head.
I tried laying on my stomach only to drool on my pillow and wake myself up. I'd flip over and begin breathing out of my mouth only to nearly choke on the dryness of it.
Early on I was relieved that I could at least breathe, until later when I tried to stop mouth breathing and felt suffocated by whatever was blocking my nasal passage. Not to mention the razor blades in my throat.
After talking (whining) to Wally early on I almost burst into tears at the thought of working the next three days feeling so yucky (clearly I feel like I'm psychic to think I will feel terrible for the rest of the week). How in the world was I going to do a bajillion hour trip with such a long first flight. The thought overwhelmed me.
However, at some point after breakfast, after Wally left for the day I decided to just swallow my feelings and decide to be as positive as I could possibly muster. Being depressed doesn't help anyone.
So here I sit in the sun light, in my favourite chair preparing to go out to pick up a couple things, get the last load of laundry done for our trip and make a couple of phone calls. I have a couple of hours to get stuff done and maybe squeeze in 'relax' time before my nine hour day (that I'm praying goes off without a hitch).
If you are a prayer, please do. Regarding both my health, Wally's too and for a safe and easy travels.
There is a whole other prayer request for when we finally get there. That we might have our eyes opened and hearts changed in great ways.
Cheers!
Sunday, March 13, 2011
Gettin' Ready
Well a week from now Wally and I will likely be over an ocean somewhere just about in Thailand.
We can hardly believe it.
Yesterday was the day to get things done including booking our park, SLEEP, and fly hotel room for Friday, looking into yet STILL not committed to our 3 night stay in Bangkok on our way back, picking up Wally some sandals since we thought he had thrown his old ones out last year (then we found out they were still in the closet!!). We went to Home Depot to get some house stuff for my dad to install, returned some pants that I should've never thought I could wear, getting some money exchanged into Thai currency and a stop for frozen yogurt.
We learned in our travels ...
* travel agencies are useless
* don't expect your bank to exchange money for you even if their website tell you they can
* don't trust scanners at the shoe store
* buying your favourite snacks for travel is best done within minutes before locking your luggage up
* planning is exhausting
* we are more ready than we've ever been to go on this trip even though we honestly have no idea what we are doing or what to expect
While with friends today at lunch we were speaking of the trip and I commented how I couldn't have ever imagined ten years ago when we were married that we'd be spending our diamond anniversary doing this trip.
It's a dream come true in so many ways.
It's really only been in the past few months that I can imagine us actually being able to do this. I finally feel fairly confident that we will not only survive this trip still married at the end but we may actually BOTH enjoy it and be brought closer together. I can hope anyways.
This morning I did lots of packing and planning. We initially thought that maybe we wouldn't need our two large suitcases but once we actually put our clothes into them we realized indeed they were both needed. I'm just glad I'm not as high maintainance (sp?) as many other women.
Right now I am exhausted (I've been complaining about that a lot lately) and now finally feeling allowed to be more excited than worried. I trust that the end of our trip will fall into place.
I won't likely be blogging while away as we're not taking our laptop and I like privacy when writing. Instead I'll be journaling lots and will post when we arrive home. Maybe, just maybe I'll share some pictures.
For not I have to go. Pray for us.
We can hardly believe it.
Yesterday was the day to get things done including booking our park, SLEEP, and fly hotel room for Friday, looking into yet STILL not committed to our 3 night stay in Bangkok on our way back, picking up Wally some sandals since we thought he had thrown his old ones out last year (then we found out they were still in the closet!!). We went to Home Depot to get some house stuff for my dad to install, returned some pants that I should've never thought I could wear, getting some money exchanged into Thai currency and a stop for frozen yogurt.
We learned in our travels ...
* travel agencies are useless
* don't expect your bank to exchange money for you even if their website tell you they can
* don't trust scanners at the shoe store
* buying your favourite snacks for travel is best done within minutes before locking your luggage up
* planning is exhausting
* we are more ready than we've ever been to go on this trip even though we honestly have no idea what we are doing or what to expect
While with friends today at lunch we were speaking of the trip and I commented how I couldn't have ever imagined ten years ago when we were married that we'd be spending our diamond anniversary doing this trip.
It's a dream come true in so many ways.
It's really only been in the past few months that I can imagine us actually being able to do this. I finally feel fairly confident that we will not only survive this trip still married at the end but we may actually BOTH enjoy it and be brought closer together. I can hope anyways.
This morning I did lots of packing and planning. We initially thought that maybe we wouldn't need our two large suitcases but once we actually put our clothes into them we realized indeed they were both needed. I'm just glad I'm not as high maintainance (sp?) as many other women.
Right now I am exhausted (I've been complaining about that a lot lately) and now finally feeling allowed to be more excited than worried. I trust that the end of our trip will fall into place.
I won't likely be blogging while away as we're not taking our laptop and I like privacy when writing. Instead I'll be journaling lots and will post when we arrive home. Maybe, just maybe I'll share some pictures.
For not I have to go. Pray for us.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)